Well, not really... but I couldn't resist the headline. As David St. Hubbins of Spinal Tap so eloquently put it: "You know, several, you know, dozens of people spontaneously combust each year. It's just not really widely reported."

Because much like the fictional Spinal Tap's famed bad luck in drummers (all of whom have either disappeared or died in mysterious circumstances), President Obama now needs a new Secretary of Commerce.

His first choice, Bill Richardson, had to pull his name out of consideration due to pressing matters with a federal grand jury. And now it appears that Republican Senator Judd Gregg of New Hampshire had too many policy differences with the president to accept the job. An interesting side note is the furor Gregg caused in the Granite State over his recusal in the stimulus package vote -- which came from both sides (for different reasons). Now Gregg will have to actually vote, and as a New England Republican it will be interesting to see if he will follow the only other Republicans in his neck of the woods (Maine's Olympia Snowe and Susan Collins, and Pennsylvania's Arlen Specter) and vote with the president, or tie his own fortunes to the rest of the Republicans who are voting "nay."

But whichever way Gregg votes, Obama still needs a new person to lead Commerce, and incidentally someone to lead Health and Human Services as well. I've already thrown my support behind Howard Dean for H.H.S., but I must admit I'm at a loss as to who would be best for the Department of Commerce.

One major bone of contention between Gregg and Obama was over what could possibly be the most important of the next Commerce Secretary's term -- overseeing the Census Bureau and the census of 2010. Censuses (Censii?) are critically important because they determine how much federal money goes to states and districts, and how the House of Representatives will be reapportioned in 2010. There's an ongoing struggle by some Democrats to have the census use statistical methods to improve the undercount of the most vulnerable people among us -- those who move around a lot, and those who are homeless. Republicans see this as sacrilege, and demand that only an exact count of the people the census can find be used. President Obama, after Gregg was nominated, made some interesting comments about how he may raise the Census Bureau itself to Cabinet-level, meaning they would report only to Obama (and not to the Commerce Secretary). So there was obviously a difference of opinion there.

So Obama should pick his next Commerce nominee from someone who agrees with him on how the census will be conducted, at a minimum. Because if he doesn't, we may have to go through this all over again. Spinal Tap went through fifteen or twenty drummers before Mick Fleetwood showed up to audition in a fireproof suit. Obama's next pick needs to be just as fireproof, and they need to figure it out before they announce him or her this time, and not after.

-- Chris Weigant