Being Hit On The Head Lessons
Well, that was downright stunning. And definitely not in a good way ("You look simply stunning tonight!"). More in the literal sense of getting brutally smacked upside your head by a blunt object. In fact, when I sat down to think up a title for this article, the only thing that popped into my mind was the line from the classic Monty Python "Argument" sketch: "It's 'being hit on the head' lessons, in here." Because that's exactly what watching the entire 100 minutes was like, at least to me.
After sitting through all of the first presidential debate between Joe Biden and Donald Trump, I am even more convinced (as I wrote a while back) that there may wind up being only one such debate this year. It wouldn't surprise me in the least if Donald Trump refuses to do a second or third debate, because the reviews are going to be absolutely terrible for him to read. I watched the debate on ABC, and when it was finished George Stephanopoulos immediately summed it up as: "the worst presidential debate I have seen in my entire life." I could not agree more.
It was nothing short of a spectacle. It was like the debate commission had been replaced by WWE wrestling. It was closer to an octagon cage match than an actual debate. Shakespeare summed up Donald Trump's performance best in Macbeth, in fact: "It was a tale, told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing."
After a normal debate, I usually try to write an article with a clear format -- critique the debate itself, the moderators, the technical aspects, the body language, etc., and then move on to summarize the substance of what was said and how each debater did. I might not be able to do this tonight, because to impose form or substance on what we all just witnessed is impossible. It'd be just as impossible as trying to teach kittens to do synchronized gymnastics.
Overall, the debate format was to blame for a lot of the craziness we saw. Apparently, the rules were supposed to be that each person would get two uninterrupted minutes to have their say, and then there would be a free-for-all back-and-forth. This was the wrong way to go, obviously. A much better format would have been: the moderator can cut off your microphone whenever he feels it necessary, and as often as he likes.
For the most part, Fox News moderator Chris Wallace appeared just as stunned as the rest of us. Finally he tried to smack Trump down (repeatedly) but it was really both too little and too late. Trump was talking over Wallace until the very final minute of the debate, in fact. To say nothing of how Trump absolutely refused to allow Joe Biden to get a word in edgewise. Trump looked like nothing more than the bully he truly is, to state the painfully obvious.
Joe Biden obviously practiced the tactics of not getting drawn too deeply into Trump's bombast, instead making his case directly to the American people, staring straight into the camera. If this had been a normal debate, that would be what we'd all be talking about now. It was effective and the difference between Biden and Trump was notable. But it kind of got lost in the Trump trainwreck, in the end.
I'll make a prediction, here. Tomorrow, we'll get the instant ratings on viewership, and I'd bet that -- at the start -- the debate drew in an audience bigger than any previous presidential debate ever (the high mark for this was Trump's first debate with Hillary Clinton, in fact). But after the first half-hour of watching, I'd also bet that a significant part of the audience tuned out -- through sheer exhaustion.
I don't blame them. I would have done the same, if I were not duty-bound to watch the whole thing so I could report on it.
The thing is, this is not to Trump's advantage. Trump absolutely needed to change the course of his campaign tonight, and he utterly failed to do so in any way. He needed to convince a whole lot of Americans that he was the better bet, and instead he drove them away in frustration.
All Joe Biden had to do was to prove he was a sane adult and had the best interests of the country at heart. He cleared this bar easily, and often. There were no major gaffes. There were no embarrassing moments for him. For the most part, Biden refused to let Trump get under his skin. He was calm, he was speaking to the American people, and he had a clear vision for the future. Unlike Trump.
In fact, because Biden was so calm and mostly spoke in a normal voice without shouting (also unlike Trump), he was able to get in several scathing comments -- most of which Trump didn't even notice. Here are just a few of them:
"Everything he says is a lie."
"Will you shut up?"
"Get out of the bunker -- get out of the sandtrap."
"He said to inject bleach."
"You've got to have a plan."
"Will you just shush for a moment?"
"He's a fool."
"Show us your tax returns!"
"You're the worst president America has ever had."
"None of that is true."
"He doesn't want to let me answer, because he doesn't want to hear the truth."
"It's hard to get any word in, with this clown."
"He's the racist."
"You have no ideas."
"We've become weaker, sicker, poorer, and more divided."
"He's Putin's puppy."
"He never keeps his word."
"You'll get four more years of his lies."
"He's afraid of counting the votes."
And, to close on:
"He has no idea what he's talking about."
Almost all of these went unchallenged by Trump -- because he didn't even notice them (since he was screaming so loudly). This was the most savage takedown of Trump in any debate, ever -- including all the ones where the Republican candidates tried to cut him down to size. OK, admittedly no comparisons of genital size happened; but even so, Biden got in so many scathing putdowns of Trump it was downright astonishing. Again, if it weren't for Trump's enormous meltdown, that would also be what the headlines would have been written about tomorrow morning.
The only real weak moments for Biden came when he refused to answer two questions. The first was noticeable, while the second was fleeting (Chris Wallace broke in and asked another question instead of letting Biden twist in the wind). In the first, Biden absolutely refused to answer whether he'd be in favor of getting rid of the filibuster or "packing the Supreme Court." He gave a reason for not answering, but it was weak -- he really should answer the question one way or another, even just by saying: "We'll see when the time comes," or some other punt-the-ball answer. The second came when Trump challenged him to name one law enforcement group that had endorsed him, and Biden kind of froze. But overall, if those were the two worst moments for Biden, he had a pretty good night all around.
Biden really had two best moments of the night. The first came when Trump tried out his "Biden will destroy the suburbs" rhetoric, to which Biden shot back: "He wouldn't know a suburb unless he took a wrong turn. I grew up in the suburbs. This isn't 1950." Biden continued by pointing out that suburbs have been integrated for decades, and white people who live there aren't panicking at the thought of a person of color moving in next to them.
The second came after one of Trump's multiple attempts to attack Hunter Biden by throwing everything but the kitchen sink at him. Finally, after this had happened repeatedly (on multiple unrelated subjects), Biden shot back with some real anger, pointing out that Trump had called American soldiers "suckers" and "losers" and saying his son Beau Biden was neither, after serving in Iraq and being awarded a Bronze Star, finishing with: "He was not a sucker." Trump refused to even listen, and went right on attacking Hunter instead.
As for Trump's performance, as Biden put it at one point, it was "so unpresidential." Trump was pure Trump, which is to say all id. He screamed his way through all his big applause lines he delivers at his rallies, but never seemed to land a single punch on Biden. For all his screaming about "socialism" or "the far left," none of it fit Biden at all -- it just fell off Biden's back like water off a duck. Trump tried his usual: "I'm the greatest president in American history" schtick, and it fell flatter than a pancake. Trump got in more arguments with Chris Wallace than with Biden, it almost seemed, as he just refused to shut up for a single moment. Wallace forcefully smacked this down for brief moments throughout the night, but then Trump would just start talking all over everyone once again.
It wasn't a good look. It certainly isn't going to convince any undecided voter to entrust him with leading the country for another four years. Trump tried to hold a rally, but his cheering crowds were nowhere to be heard. He lied so constantly the fact-checkers will be working overtime tonight just to catalogue them all. Trump even tried taking shots at Bernie Sanders, Hillary Clinton, and even dropped a "Pocahontas" reference. None of it worked, because Biden largely stayed on his own script and just flat-out laughed at Trump and ignored his bluster.
Trump has been putting out for months that Biden was going to just gibber and drool during the debate, but it was Trump himself who actually had a few "senior moments" in the midst of the fray. Trump had obviously practiced a taunt to level at Biden, but he couldn't even remember the right phrase the first time he tried to use it. Instead of "law and order," Trump instead charged that Biden "couldn't even say 'law enforcement'." As Rick Perry might say... "Oops." Trump later did remember the right phrase (after it was used by Chris Wallace), but I'm wondering if anyone else noticed this senior moment from Trump. He also, at one point, said: "I was a private businesspeople," instead of "businessman."
Trump stumbled over several arguments, as when he tried to (in the same segment) charge that Joe Biden (1) was against shutting the country down for the pandemic, and (2) wanted the country to stay shut down forever, so he could ruin the economy (or something...). That these two directly contradicted each other apparently didn't occur to Trump at all.
Trump accused Biden of using the word "superpredator" when he brought up Biden's 1994 crime bill, but (as I recall) wasn't that what Hillary Clinton said about it instead? I'd have to look that up, but I could have sworn I had heard this from the debates four years ago.... This was right before Trump couldn't remember the phrase "law and order," by the way.
Trump tried to put Biden on the spot when Biden pointed out that one of his spokespeople had nakedly claimed that violence in the streets "helps Trump." Trump refused to believe this, and asked: "Who said that?" Biden paused, and then correctly answered: "Kellyanne Conway." Several times, Trump actually set Biden up for making bold statements against the caricature Trump tried to paint him as.
Trump's worst moment came when he was repeatedly challenged by Chris Wallace to denounce violence on both sides, and after Trump refused (preferring instead to denounce "Antifa"), he finally came up with: "Proud Boys, stand back and stand by." That, not to put too fine a point on it, is not the same as a denunciation. And then Trump was off again about Antifa.
Trump ended with an extended rant on ballots, and cheating, and election-rigging, etc., which only served to point out how unstable he truly is.
After writing all of this, I am left with a rather unusual conclusion, for such a trainwreck of a wrestling match of a debate: Joe Biden quietly dominated for the entire night. Now, "quietly" is a strange word to use about what happened tonight, but it seems appropriate. Biden, for the most part, refused to yell and scream (although there were a few times when both candidates were yelling so loud you couldn't hear a single word), and he had the patience of Job in dealing with Trump's constant and unrelenting interruptions. Biden mostly kept an even keel and kept his voice at a conversational level. To the extent that he could, he addressed the American people directly, through the camera. Biden's shots at Trump were delivered in such a low key that Trump didn't even notice them -- which is truly an extraordinary turn of events.
It was crystal clear which man on that stage tonight should be our next president. If any undecided voters tuned in, that had to have been the only takeaway possible. You could say that Joe Biden didn't so much win the debate as much as Donald Trump spectacularly lost it. Trump desperately needed a game-changer. He didn't get one. Which is why I remain doubtful if Trump will even agree to another debate at all -- it truly was that bad of a performance -- and if all the reviewers don't unequivocally say so, I'm going to be left wondering what is wrong with them.
Correction: This article was originally published with a misquote of one of the more important lines of the night. I originally wrote that Trump told the Proud Boys to "stand back and stand down," but the actual quote finished with "stand by." This has been corrected in the text, and my apologies for the error.
-- Chris Weigant
Follow Chris on Twitter: @ChrisWeigant
At 9:18 pm I was done. I couldn't watch any more.
Short Fingers knows he's going to lose. He's just determined to cause as much destruction as possible before he flees to Russia.
Apologies to all (and to Monty Python) -- that should have read "Argument Clinic" sketch:
(Slams door. walks down corridor, opens next door.)
Man: Hello, I want to... Ooooh!
Spreaders: No, no, no. Hold your head like this, then go Waaah. Try it again.
Man: uuuwwhh!!
Spreaders: Better, Better, but Waah, Waah! Put your hand there.
Man: No.
Spreaders: Now..
Man: Waaaaah!!!
Spreaders: Good, Good! That's it.
Man: Stop hitting me!!
Spreaders: What?
Man: Stop hitting me!!
Spreaders: Stop hitting you?
Man: Yes!
Spreaders: Why did you come in here then?
Man: I wanted to complain.
Spreaders: Oh no, that's next door. It's being-hit-on-the-head lessons in here.
Man: What a stupid concept.
:-)
-CW
What possible purpose could more "debates" serve? What more does anyone need to see?
Vote!
JFC -
I certainly wish I could have bailed, but my motto is: "I watch this stuff so you don't have to!!!"
Heh. Dedication to the job, I guess... that or sheer masochism...
-CW
Oh, forgot the link (to the transcript, you'll have to find the video on your own, sorry):
http://montypython.50webs.com/scripts/Series_3/27.htm
-CW
I so wish I could volunteer as a poll worker in a swing state.
Full quote from George:
"I have to speak personally here as someone who’s watched presidential debates for 40 years, as somebody who’s moderated presidential debates, as somebody who’s prepared candidates for presidential debates, as someone who’s covered presidential debates — that was the worst presidential debate I’ve ever seen in my life."
-CW
It's just so demoralizing to know that I live in a country where so many people would vote to re-elect him. It was bad enough the first time around, but what excuse do they have now? The only upside is that there won't be enough of them.
Apparently, CNN had the best reaction:
“That was a hot mess, inside a dumpster fire, inside a train wreck,” said CNN host Jake Tapper. “That was the worst debate I have ever seen. It wasn’t even a debate. It was a disgrace.”
His CNN colleague Dana Bash had even sharper words: “I’m just going to say it like it is. That was a shitshow.”
-CW
From what I saw, I don't think that Biden was very good, but I'm unsurprised. I wonder what it's like to be in the same room with the orange one. It must be shocking to see a monster in the flesh. I feel weirdly fortunate that I only experience it on the TV screen.
I prefer the Hollywood bowl effort by Python...
Cleese is in no way a little too conciliatory...lol
Correction, It will be Biden who says, let's wrap this shit show up.
It would be the shrewdist political move of the year for Biden to hold a presser tomorrow and announce that the people saw what they needed to see, and that he'd prefer to save them further embarrassment. Biden impressed enough today because Trump imploded.
Let Harris knock seven shades of holy shit out Pence, or as they in the UK let harris pound pence.
Then throw the whole thing at Trump's feet, declare him fuck-off, and let him stew and froth to his base for a month.
Trump hung himself on his own petard of vulgarity, lies and obnoxiousness...
"And in the end, the love you take, is equal to the love you make..."
The End.
LL&P
JTC [12] -
I still think it'll be Trump who folds his tent.
We'll see, with his early-morning tweets tomorrow, I guess...
:-)
-CW
Nobody liked the fact that I worked both Monty Python and Shakespeare into the opening?
Heh. I mean, just sayin'...
OK, that's it for me. Gotta go watch late-night and see how the comics treat it... I'll see everyone tomorrow for the aftermath....
-CW
Oh, completely off topic, but equally epic, this summer I went all in with my aquarium fish, they all got an upgrade. The Piranhas (Arshole and Prick, the kids named them, bless their hearts) went from 65 gal to 100, the Angel Fish, (Widget) went into the 65 and the Oscars, (Biscuit and Mikey Jr) went into a 125 and the 100gal salt water (w.Nipple, the Clown Fish and Vercingetorix, the Octopus got some new corral.
What's epic is, during Trump's resignation from office, the Oscars fell into the last throes of mating and we now have several hundred Oscar eggs being overseen by the happy parents.
Contain yourselves, it's a lot to digest.
LL&P
Shakespeare, come on...CW, that's an easy layup...
"You speak an infinite deal of nothing"
Merchant of Venice.
LOLL&P
Yes it was Hillary who used the term "superpredators."
Okay, okay. It was cool working both Shakespeare & Monty Python into this column, but we're simply not of a mood of kindness and gratitude after this shit show.
Seven word summary:
Joe didn't "lose" and Trump didn't "win."
JFC really hit the nail on the head,
It's just so demoralizing to know that I live in a country where so many people would vote to re-elect him. It was bad enough the first time around, but what excuse do they have now? The only upside is that there won't be enough of them.
It was pretty clear where Don, Jr. and his screams like a banshee girlfriend got whatever they were on during their RNC speeches...Daddy Dumbest! Not sure if it was cocaine, crushed up Adderall, or a mix of the two... but Trump was definitely wired!
Which makes perfect sense if you remember that Trump’s campaign told Team Biden that both candidates should have to take a drug test before the debate... which Team Biden laughed off as being ridiculous...because it was! This wasn’t an Olympic event, it was a freaking presidential debate!
Now Trump supporters can point to Trump’s supposed “willingness” to take a drug test prior to the debate as hard evidence that there was no way that Trump would have been on any drug. I gotta give him credit, he is a true master at this kind of deflection.
I wouldn't be surprised if Trump decides to wuss on the other two debates. Under no circumstances should Joe bail on the other two debates because tonight only helped Joe.
JTC [15] -
Aren't the Oscars the big ugly ones? I mean no disrespect by that, just my own limited knowledge of aquaria fish. I had a college friend who had an Oscar and fed it goldfish just to see people cringe... so you now have several hundred of them?!?
[16]
"A pound of this merchant's flesh is yours."
Heh.
MtnCaddy [17] -
I thought so...
[18] -
Amen. And thanks for the kind words about the Brit cites... heh...
-CW
Nobody liked the fact that I worked both Monty Python and Shakespeare into the opening?
i did. well done!
CW: Almost all of these went unchallenged by Trump -- because he didn't even notice them (since he was screaming so loudly).
I know, right!? And when Trump did challenge Biden on one of these, it was Trump lying (again) that he was being "sarcastic."
*
Total bullshit! Trump was being dead serious when he made those comments regarding the light and disinfectant:
*
Trump wasn't being sarcastic; he was serious... so serious, in fact, that the White House discontinued those briefings for weeks after that.
So to recap: Trump has to go. He is knowingly killing people and has no plan to do anything about the coronavirus except to take away health care for millions of Americans during a pandemic.
Chris Weigant
3
Heh. :)
John From Censornati
4
What possible purpose could more "debates" serve?
Exactly!
What more does anyone need to see?
Not a thing. Only the moronic dipshits who believe that talking over everyone else, lying repeatedly and just making shit up constitutes an actual debate need to tune in to another shitshow like that.
I appreciate the report on your take on the debate. I missed it, following my general rule that the president's voice must not be heard and his image must not be watched, as all it causes me is much heightened stress. And it's not like I don't already know 1) who I'm voting for, with no possibility of changing my mind, and 2) that everything the president says must be taken as a lie until independent actions, not words, by others demonstrate its truth.
As to the next debate or debates, I suppose the president or Uncle Joe could withdraw. Who knows? But my impression from your report and the general feedback from friends and other media commentary is that there will be an intense pressure on the producers to have a closed-mic policy. No sound, except and only except when it's a candidate's turn to speak to the camera.
Last night simply revived an old American tradition. For 40 Years, Crashing Trains Was One of America’s Favorite Pastimes. From 1896 until the 1930s, showmen would travel the country staging wrecks at state fairs.
https://www.atlasobscura.com/articles/staged-train-wrecks
I believe that Biden made an error when he used the word clown. He opened the door for a flood of both-sides-ism coverage by doing that. I didn't watch so I don't know if he said anything else like that.
Chris,
Well, you really do deserve a medal for patience, dedication and perseverance AND our undying appreciation for all that you do and go through.
But, I don't think I agree with you one hundred percent there on your analysis of Biden's performance last night.
That's because, unlike most people, I have the highest of expectations when it comes to all things Biden. And, so I have to say, regrettably, that my guy squandered as many opportunities as Trump gave him last night.
For the next debate, here's what I'd like to hear Biden get in edgewise ...
This president doesn't know how to lead. He doesn't understand the first fundamental thing about how to keep Americans safe and secure. Worse than even that, he doesn't care. ----LET ME FINISH. BE QUIET!!! ----
And, that's just for starters.
he finally came up with: "Proud Boys, stand back and stand down."
He said "stand back and stand by" which is a lot worse.
JFC, I agree. Biden should have called him MISTER PRESIDENT, can you act presidential for one minute!?
Agreed, again!
"A much better format would have been: the moderator can cut off your microphone whenever he feels it necessary, and as often as he likes."
That is much better, but it puts a lot of pressure on the moderator. Let's use 1950's game show level technology to make following the rules absolutely mandatory:
Candidates are at their podiums in two air conditioned, visually transparent but sound proofed booths. Moderator comments and crowd audio are always piped in to both booths...but audio output from each candidate's microphone is strictly limited (by a timer) to 2 minutes on, and two minutes off.
Candidates are free at all times to jump up and down, mouth words, wave their arms and so on....but I doubt this would catch on. The Donald might be an exception.
This is big box store technology - it could be implemented in time for the next debate.
INTERESTING FACT CHECK
RE-34 Of course, if don't have a live audience, you can do the whole thing with Zoom (or equivalent tech) and some security tweaks. Candidates and the moderator can all stay at home. Late Night TV Hosts have been prototyping this approach for months.
Kick:
Trump Lies? Gosh.
Biden's best line: on the lives being lost in the US due to the failure of the Trump administration ...
"It is what it is because you are who you are."
Biden needs to expand upon this line at the next debate.
TheStig
37
Trump Lies? Gosh.
I know, right!? Of course... which is why I titled it "interesting fact check"... a sign of the "gaslighting times" that we're living in when the President of the United States gets immediately fact checked in real time via Twitter by the very subject of the lies that he's inventing in rapid fire succession. #Pathetic
G'Morn everybody, did we all sleep well after having to take multiple hot showers last night?
As is my wont, I present the latest from The Lincoln Project, The Collapse regarding Trump's performance last night,
Decency, a look at character, and A Zoo Story with secret footage of Team Trump's debate preparations.
Aaaand...I'm Smart which is self explanatory.
JFc [31] -
You are right. I will fix it.
I wrote so hastily last night that I forgot my standard disclaimer:
"All quotes were jotted down in real time and I may not have gotten the words exactly correct, but I think I caught the main feeling behind them."
As you point out, that Proud Boys quote is an important one, and I essentially changed the meaning. So I'll go fix it...
-CW
OK, fixed. I added a "Correction" note at the end, too. Thanks for pointing it out, JFC...
-CW
LizM [38] -
You're right, that was a pretty good line. I must have missed it in my notes, but reading it again today, you're right -- it is effective.
MtnCaddy [41] -
Thanks for the links!
:-)
-CW
Chris,
At the next debate or when the climate apocalypse comes up, Biden needs to say something nice about the new Green Deal. Ahem.
It shouldn't be a problem. Maybe I'll send him a memo ...
OK, still a little shell-shocked from last night, but I managed to take a look forward at what's coming next:
http://www.chrisweigant.com/2020/09/30/whats-next/
-CW